What’s the one thing you have told yourself you can’t do?

Photo by Jeremy Bishop on Unsplash

I was having a conversation last week with my partner when he said something profound to me. He pretty much exclaimed, He said “Babe, this is what they call a growth mindset!". I know you are probably curious as to what he was referring to. Well, he was referring to the way I was beginning to see "challenges" as opportunities and embracing new paths of thinking in data analysis (because as we all know, data is the now and the future—especially in this developed part of the world).

When he pointed out my new attitude, it was a major highlight for me, which took me down memory lane. Previously I would say I had pretty much struggled with a fixed mindset when it comes to mastering anything quantitative. I was that girl who thought I could never learn anything that has to do with data because it just wasn’t me. I always prided myself on my qualitative skill and gave excuses for my quantitative skills; that it wasn’t my thing and I wasn’t cut out for it. This is a mindset I began cultivating as early as grade 3, and it grew stronger through my university days. My life decisions regarding career aspirations had one rule, no matter what you do, stick to your strengths and don't stress over the analytics. 

There are several reasons I could use to defend my choice of sticking to my strength and avoiding anything that made me look weak (e.g. data). But one of those reasons was living in a fixed mindset. If someone had told me I was operating from a fixed mindset, I probably would have challenged them but reading Carol Dweck's book on Mindsets was eye-opening. I observed some patterns that I had operated in and begun to see how this mindset was limiting.

Living in a fixed mindset can be validating, especially when you are scared of failure or rejection, and this is what I had done for a very long time unknowingly. It's not bad to stick to what you know or play to your areas of strength. The problem is when you stick to your strengths because you have constantly told yourself "I can't do this other thing". That’s where the limitation comes in.

And so this week, I astonished my partner by telling him I can lean more into learning about data analysis. I know it would be challenging, but I am willing to learn it because I have seen how it influences all my work. And I have also seen how it increases my value/ competitiveness in today's world. I am not trying to become a data analyst—who knows, I could become one— but I am just trying to allow myself to learn something that I have always been scared of. I have already failed a couple of times, asked what some might refer to as the silliest of questions, but you know what? All that doesn’t matter, because I am learning, I am growing. I challenged myself to do something I had always considered hard, and that’s the best feeling in the world.

Now I know there's nothing I can't do. As long as I put my mind to it, I can learn it just like anybody else. It might take a longer time for me than others, but my joy comes from my ability to open my mind to learn. And that my friend, is the growth mindset we are talking about.

What's that thing you have been scared of? What's that thing for which you have told yourself: “I can't do this”, “I can never achieve greatness in this”, “I can never be good enough?” You know that thing right? Now, I challenge you to go out there and try it. Don’t be discouraged if you fail at the first attempt, just keep trying because you can do anything you put your mind to. When you try, feel the liberation that comes with having this growth mindset. It's pure bliss!